You know my name, not my story.

This blog is a part of my life. This is who I am, my goals, my dreams and my fuck ups.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

So...i suck....yep


Well, as you see the title, i suck. Greatly. Yea i've been ding a lot lot of binging. I've been destroying myself with food. Can i ask a question? WHY DO I LOOK SKINNIER AT 115 THAN AT 109???WTF Like you could see my ribs and i had a flatter tummy, so wtf?


Whatever, at 95 i'll look perfect....


So tomorrow i'm going to make it a final binge day. I know gross. But it will help me in the long run. Then i'm going to go food shopping. I'm going to buy fruits and low cal stuff. so that's good.

here's my plan...


BACK ON TRACK LIST
get more healthy fruits and veggies.
Eat no more than 500 cals a day.
Finish this routine by the end of each day
-200 star jumps
-200 sit ups
-200 crunches
-1 hr of walking
Drink at least 6 bottles of water each day
NO JUNK FOOD
Focus on studying to show everyone i'm not a dumb ass

~~~~~~~~~

Yep, i've actually brought my grade up in world history but my mom doesn't believe me soo...wtf?

The teacher even told the class that i'm been doing fabulously and that you can bring up you're grade if you try.


But apparently i'm lying.

ughh

~~

Anyway, I feel all bloated and gross. I feel like i'm going to get my period soon. My weight is pretty much near "normal" so i wouldn't doubt it. It would be nice to know that in my quest for perfection i didn't harm my babymaker. (Sorry if it is TMI lol) Anyway.....

~~


Yep. Oh yea i read a funny thing. Some one's signature was


Eatin's Cheatin


It rhythms and anything that rhythms sticks in my head so it will help me lol.



I really want to fast but i'm going to wait in till i regain control.


Thank you all for commenting. It's annoying how much pressure is put on us and for the littlest things we get reprimanded. We need some way to cope, which 'some' say is why ED occurs. But why should they care? We are becoming perfect, is that a bad thing? Nope. So be quiet while i shrink away.


Ana luv to you.

Starve On, and Think Thin

~Riki Ana

2 comments:

  1. It's okay, we still love you even if you binge occasionally. None of us are perfect.. yet. :]

    ReplyDelete