You know my name, not my story.

This blog is a part of my life. This is who I am, my goals, my dreams and my fuck ups.

Monday, December 14, 2009

Time spent wasting is not wasted time.

How weird is it that I'm not even hungry. AT ALL!!! On Saturday night i got the stomach flu and was throwing up all night. It was horrible. The next morning i lost 2 lbs bringing me down to 112. Then yesterday i was fasting because my stomach hurt, i only had a bowl of crackers the entire day. Today is going to be pretty much the same.

This morning i was complaining how it sucked to throw up all night, and my mom was like "i don't know how those bulimics do it, throwing up after every meal, i hate throwing up." For the couple times I've purged after eating it's like different that being forced to throw up. Like, making yourself do it is almost graceful compared to having no control over throwing up....
But i don't really have much insight about that since I'm more Ana....

So i think i had somewhere around 250 cals...not bad. But at weigh in this morning i was at 113...hopefully it's water weight, it would make no sense since i barely ate anything yesterday.

After looking at the comments for the jumping jack things i also hope it's 1 cal per jumping jack....I'll have to look into it more.....

Anyway,

Tomorrow I'll might do the apple diet with a Clementine. It's 10 slices per Clementine so i could have 2 slices for breakfast, 2 slices for lunch, 2 slices for a snack, and and 4 slices for dinner... sounds pretty good, and around 60 cal. If i can do that till Christmas I'll probably be around 105.

So that's all for now.
Starve on my skinny bitches
~Riki Ana

3 comments:

  1. i totally get what you mean about the difference between throwing up by choice and throwing up from being sick. it's the control feeling that makes the big difference.

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  2. I've gotta say, I agree with your mom on that one. Throwing up by choice actually makes me feel more out of control than ever, knowing that I binged and have to suffer for it. As a result, I've only done it once, after a binge that, compared to some others, was absolutely nothing.
    Stay strong with your Clementines. :]

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  3. Hei :)
    Whats the apple diet? Never heard of that before. Does it mean U can only eat apples? Is it a good diet?
    Love your blog btw xoxo

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