You know my name, not my story.

This blog is a part of my life. This is who I am, my goals, my dreams and my fuck ups.

Saturday, November 14, 2009


Ok girlies. Blogging now takes up so much of my time. Like on days where i decided not to blog I'm like "must NOT blog, MUST NOT BLOG, DON'T BLOG!" But really I love it.

Ok so i know it's been a couple days. I had my little breakdown... But now i want Ana's warm embrace to hold me. I want to look at that left over pizza and laugh thinking Really? That many carbs, calories for THAT?

I have found a couple songs that aren't really pro-Ana but they work in a couple verses and i feel the tune of the song is quite pro-Ana

Stop and Stare-OneRepublic
Over and Over- Three Days Grace
Till I Collapse - Eminem

This is the first verse of "Till i Collapse"
"sometimes you just feel tired.You feel weak. And when you feel weak, you feel like you wanna just give up. But you gotta search within you, gotta find that inner strength and just pull that shit out of you, and get that motivation to not give up, and not be a quitter, no matter how bad you wanna just fall flat on your face and collapse."

I find it's very thinspriational when your about to binge.

Ok, i've been avoiding it but here is where Ana addresses my Binges

Dear Riki,

You've been very bad Ana lately. You have been listening to Norma too much lately. You've not been counting. How do i know this? Well, my dear Ana knows all.

When you get onto the lunch line during lunch i see you look around. Seeing if anyone notices you failing. They do my dear they do. Then you pay and sit down at your table. I notice how you don't look up at anyone. You think i can't see them, they can't see me eating. Honey they notice what a fat pig you are. You don't look up because you'll see me. Staring, Watching, Crying as all of my hard work dies because of your grease filled french fries, and your lard fried cheese sticks.

What did you have for breakfast today?
WTF? Riki, you are very disappointing.
Want to know what your readers are doing when they read that.
They gag.
What Ana EATS PIZZA!?!?!?

Get your last party in today you fat lazy pig. This is your last sick day. Tommorrow you eat A HEATHLY breakfast of celery, skip lunch and eat dinner with the family.

I must say i was proud of you one day. Your mother gave you your plate so you took two slices of meat and then no potatoes, and and some veggies.
You barley ate any of it.
Congrats you don't completely suck after all.

Get back on track you lazy fat ass.

Your weigh in today of 112. Is very disappointing.


I'm watching you remember.


I'll post more later maybe.

~Riki Ana


  1. I hope you do good! I love the songs too! I wanted to know if you know any good thinspo sites too.

  2. a little late for a post but i found that if i eat breakfast and skimp out on the rest of the days eatings i eat less and better. ALso it avoids me from binging.

  3. "What Ana eats pizza?" I don't know of any anorexics who would eat pizza. You are not anorexic. Your blog is an insult to those of us suffering from real eating disorders. Those of us who never wanted "Ana" and definitely didn't ask for her to "come back to us". Those of us who would give anything to be normal.
    And by the way, people who have actual EDs barely ever would call their *mental disease* "Ana" or "Mia."