You know my name, not my story.

This blog is a part of my life. This is who I am, my goals, my dreams and my fuck ups.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Rain, Rain go away so i may run my fat away.

I hate the rain. It messes up my work-outs. If only i had a car and a gym membership.
Anyway. Since it is raining here i cannot go and get my Ana stuff. (Coke zeroes, vitamins, etc...) ugh i just want to walk around town forever. Let myself shrink down in my size 5 jeans till i am just a stick figure that you can't see when i turn sideways. If only. Today would have been fantastic if my mom didn't ruin my 3 day fast on Friday. From Weds- Fri i didn't eat a single bite. Food Free! I was one pound away from my first goal weight if 102. Then my mom said that dreaded word doctor. I dropped 15 lbs since my last visit. She would notice for sure. I literally grabbed any food in site all day. My stomach and brain pleaded for me to stop. But i couldn't. I really wanted to too. Then by the end of the day i was at 111. Safe zone hopefully. The i got a call. My mom cancelled the appointment. She said i didn't need to go after all. Since my mom hates doctors i never go unless I'm dying or something. FML. I gained 8 lbs FOR NOTHING. Now here in my house a day later. Laxes still cleaning me out, but the calories stuck in me because i bought the wrong kind in my rush. Stupid overnight brand. ugh. Now I'm stuck in my house all alone doing crunches and walking around the table hoping to burn something.
To everyone out there
Starve on, and Think thin.
~Riki Ana

1 comment:

  1. I totally understand. My doctor's been on my case about my 20lb weight loss, so I've been dong everything I can to avoid seeing her. My advice? Next time when you really do have to go see the doctor, don't fill up on food. Drink as much water as you can hold, wear bulky clothing, put heavy objects in pockets (cellphones, wallets, etc.).

    - Angel