You know my name, not my story.

This blog is a part of my life. This is who I am, my goals, my dreams and my fuck ups.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Old habits return

Well, i still haven't got my maybe-std checked out. But tonight i had a scary experience.
So i was sneaking out to go hang out with a couple friends and go burn at the park down the street. So i hop out my basement window and i get down the street when my sister calls me. HOLY SHIT. i had a cigarette in my hand and i broke it while making a fist i chucked it and ran down the street and flew through the window and went upstairs. AND NO ONE WAS UP. she must have pocket dialed me or something. But my heart is still racing and i got home like an hour and a half ago.

Scariest moment ever.

This is also showing me that im still being the same old up to no good Riki. I thought i would be a good girl again like when i was younger but being bad is more fun ;)

On to Ana news finally.
My bad girl ways aren't the only thing returning. A couple of my old Ana habits are returning like feeling the bones in my wrist and drinking a full bottle of water when i wake up. And of course seeing food and instead of thinking MUST EAT NOW. its "holy shit how many calories is that?!?!" but then of course i eat it anyway.

But i think i am mentally prepared for a comeback. The other times were "ehh lets see if it sticks" now its "you better fucking do it fat ass."

Hi Ana, it's nice to see you again. :)

Love,
~Riki Ana

2 comments:

  1. Keep your strong mentality. You have the strength to achieve your goals. Get back into the swing of things when it feels right and try your hardest to dedicate yourself. I have faith in you :)

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  2. Woah, that really seemed scary.

    If you want to come back to Ana, then I guess it's your decision and we can't stop you. Just be careful. :)

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