You know my name, not my story.

This blog is a part of my life. This is who I am, my goals, my dreams and my fuck ups.

Monday, June 28, 2010

Haley's comment.

"Why do you want to be 95 pounds? Im sorry for being kinda blunt and everything but being skinny isnt everything im skinny actually very skinny way to skinny i would love to be 119 pounds im 82 pounds ive tried everything to gain weight and i cant it really sucks. i understand you u want a nice looking body but you should do it in another way work out eat healthy foods but just eat. and eat right."
^for those who didn't read her comment^

Hello Haley. Your comment is like a fishing lure hung in front of my face. I know i shouldn't but oh, wouldn't it satisfy me just to take a nibble? Hmmm, I'll bite.

I've read your blog Haley. I don't understand it really. I'm going to assume you've never had a eating disorder by your post. I'm going to assume again, that you have a VERY fast metabolism and have been blessed to be thin. But then, you know what they say about when you assume.

I'm going to help you. I understand you eat a lot. Maybe that's why your stomach always hurts.
Or, you could have something wrong with your stomach. But then of course, I'm not a doctor.

Sorry to say, i don't find curves attractive. Maybe on some people, like C, but not on me.

Eat healthy? Exercise? Oh gosh! What a revelation!

Of course I've already tried that. But when I'm not getting the results i want, why shouldn't i try something else?

Why would i want to look like a toothpick you asked. Well, in my eyes toothpicks are beautiful
But i guess to each his own.

You think bones are disgusting? Oh my dear, you've come to the wrong blog. I think bones are gorgeous.

"Be glad your not 200 or 300 or 80 b/c I'm sure that's worse than 120"

Oh i jump for joy at the fact I'm not 200/300. 80lbs is a little low for me. I say no less than 90lbs. 90 would be the extreme for me. Now 95, that would be perfect.

Why would that be perfect? You wouldn't understand. I don't even. I remember when i was younger i would never gain weight. When i finally broke that 100 lbs mark you could feel how happy i was. But inside me i felt something, a twinge of regret. A seed of self-hate and self-respect waiting to grow inside of you into a enormous flower.

I got this number in my head for many reasons, not a lot of them i could actually name. Just a thought that pop ed in my head perhaps.

You've never layed in your bed after the first day of a fast. Thinking 'oh my god i haven't eaten all day. Amazing' The amount of pride i have for myself when i think that, makes me feel as though i could fly.

I hope I've answered your questions fully. If not, comment again. I also hope you understand me a little better.

I have a question for you tho. What has brought you to my blog?
I hope you answer.

Haley I'm assuming again you don't want Starve on as your goodbye so for you.....

Gain weight
~Riki Ana

To everyone doing the fast GOOD LUCK!!! I'm starving along with you. I've already had 5cals of jello.

To all my other loves,
Stay Strong//Starve on
~Riki Ana


  1. I'm sorry if i offended you in anyway .. You are right I've never experienced a eating disorder. And i never know anyone with one.. So i guess im just curious of why some one would want to be so skinny? That is why Im at your blog. And I dont want you to think i hate skinny people becuase I wouldnt want to be fat myself I just never had the chance to feel what it was like to have a little meat on my bones.

  2. I can't do the liquid fast =[ but im doing the apple diet one apple a day and a shit ton of exercise =] if you wana join at some point its lasting till I drop twenty pounds die or the end of the summer STAY STRONG!!!!!<3

  3. Good job so far today! I only had diet soda and peppermints (150 calories total), so I did well too. I can only fast until tomorrow night though, because I have to eat dinner with my bf's parents. However, after that dinner, I might resume fasting, we'll see. Have a great evening!

    I'm glad Haley commented back to your post :) It's interesting to watch your conversation.